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A woman named Sarah shared a video explaining how much she hates “school pick up” and “playground chit chat” on her TikTok channel. She said that while other mums rush to the school playground early to chit-chat with each other before pick up, she prefers “hiding in the car until the last second” so she doesn’t have to talk to anyone. Surprisingly, many parents experience the same thing and hate the school pick up as much as Sarah.
The mum added: “School playground chit-chat isn’t for me – I like to grab and go. Please tell me I’m not the only one?”
A woman named Marinka commented saying that she always sneaks onto the playground and stands in the far back “pretending to be part of the fence”.
Another one, with username @hollie-mae, said she lives one minute away from her son’s school, he finishes at 3:15 and she leaves the house at 3:14.
“I just stay in the car in my peaceful bubble”, said another mum and TikTok user @birghtonkopbyrd explained that her son is trained to come to the corner “so I could lift him over the fence having to talk to no one”.
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On the parenting forum Netmums many women shared their “school drop off/pick up” horror stories saying they “hate it so much”.
A woman named Lana explained that she just doesn’t fit in and no one says hi to her. “Horrible feeling every morning that I have to take them down, sometimes I take them to breakfast club just to avoid the crowds.”
Another mum said she feels the same way and she always gets there last minute and “I keep myself to myself”.
A Netmums forum user added: “I know how you feel, I hate the school run too.” She explained that no one talks to her so “I stand by myself for the 10/15 minutes before the bell goes while all the other parents chat away to each other”.
Some mums opined that this is a very common problem. “Our school helps with this issue by having parent coffee mornings once every half term.
“Obviously working parents might struggle to go but I suppose they could consider booking a morning off if they really wanted to get to know other parents,” one said.
A woman named Cheryl added: “I also hate the school run but I know everyone, I don’t think it’s necessarily linked to whether people chat with you or not.”
She advised other mums struggling with this issue to get there “as last minute as possible and dash in and out”.
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“After all we are not there to make friends. If you are feeling lonely, try the meet a mum on here or join some clubs to meet people with similar interests to yourself,” she suggested.
Another woman commented that school pick up can be “hard sometimes”. She explained: “I look around and everyone seems to know their place and be chatting away.”
Her advice was to be as proactive as you can. “Go and say hi and strike up a conversation. Look for the parents of the friends of your children if you can.
“You might find that many other people are in the same situation. And you never know, you may find a new friend along the way. That said, making new friends as an adult is really hard.”
As this is a very common issue, parenting experts at SchoolMumsCorner shared their top tips to make friends at the school gates. They recommended being yourself, “genuine and open” and not being afraid the tell other parents that you would like to hang out more.
But first, it is important to make the effort. “You have to get out of your car and walk up the gate. You also have to put your phone away, make eye contact and start conversations.
“Small talk is fine, and actually really easy for people with kids – you already have a lot in common. You can also just be nice – compliment another mum on her earrings. Or mention that your child was jealous of the banana bread she made for her son last week – it is easy once you get started,” the experts suggested.
They added that parents should not “waste time with people who don’t reciprocate your friendship and save your valuable time for those that do”.
